Hubby and I got a letter from Oldest today. He's hit what I call the 2 Week Wall. He's in boot camp, and he's doubting his ability, fears failure, and is home sick something fierce. I can't explain it, but it seems like an invisible threshold they have to cross.
I remember when Hubby was in basic training - he hit this moment too. It was hard for both of us to get through, especially knowing your hands are tied and you can't do anything to help the one you love.
To get a letter like this from your kid is heartbreaking. No other word for it. Knowing you have to sit on the sidelines and wait it out while they take whatever is thrown at them is brutal. And that was really the defining moment of my day. That letter. I immediately went to my office and wrote him back, then drove up to the post office to put the letters (I'd written one the night before, too) in the postbox. He should get the letters fairly quickly - in a couple of days.
I've been an emotional mess over it. All day. A few other bits of not-so-great news has trickled in here and there, but I'm so worn out, I can't feel it. I'm numb right now. So I guess if any friends out there have bad news they want to tell me, now is the perfect time. I swear, I'll probably stare at you a minute, let it roll off my back, then ask you if you want a glass of wine. Pull up a chair, honey, I'm drinking red tonight. I hope that works for you.
On the upside, I had a major brainstorm today. I'd just had a five minute crying jag, and I don't know...I guess it cleared out the mental cobwebs, because I had all this stuff come to me about my current story. I wrote five pages after that. I'll take it!
Tomorrow, I'm going to write for a while, then turn off the computer and read. I'm currently reading Sex, Lies, and The Southern Belle - by Kathie DeNosky. Chapter one kicked off with a lot of characters, and I'm having trouble keeping them sorted. Still, I like the idea of a "new money" family having old secrets, which is a twist on the tag line, so I'm trying to stick with it.
That's all for now. I'm going to pour another glass of wine, then go lounge on the couch and read. Here's hoping the universe has served up enough punches for this weekend. I'll deal with whatever comes at me, but right now, all I really want is a few days peace.