I found a broken subplot about 20 pages back, and nearly fell out from stress when I realized that I had to either remove it from the story entirely, or go back and fix various passages to line out what I'd messed up. That set me back an entire day. A. Whole. Day. I have never needed chocolate so badly in my life!
Today I went back and fixed that subplot, fixed a few chapter hooks, and knocked back a handful of scenes. I'm happy with that. Then around 10 am, the whole tone of the day shifted. I've kind of been lingering in a state of shock and sadness since then. I just reconnected with an old friend from grade school through Facebook a few days ago, and this morning her mother passed away. I couldn't help but cry over that. Back in the day, her mom, Ms. M, was "the" neighborhood mom. You know which one I'm taking about?
Ms. M was like a second mom to me and all the other kids in our neighborhood. There were I think seven or eight of us. We were between the ages of probably 6-12...or as I remember it, grades 1-5. She was one of those truly joyful people that didn't mind taking time out to listen to what us kids had to say. I don't think there was ever a time I went over to see my friends (the two sisters - I was close friends with both) when Ms M wasn't busy cooking for people or entertaining a pack of kids, or just having tea with some of the other moms. She was such an awesome lady. Even then, I recognized how wise and fair she was.
Don't get me wrong, she could get after us brats if we got too rowdy, and we sometimes did. ;o) Every now and then she'd lay into us with a string of Spanish when we were misbehaving, or get the fly swatter after us, and it didn't matter whether we understood the language or not. We knew she meant business when she took that tone with us, and we listened.
Even then we knew she got onto us because she cared about us, all of us, and didn't want to see us get hurt. We were a reckless bunch of bike riding, tree climbing kidlets, and she tolerated a lot. There is a saying that goes"it takes a village to raise a child", and she did more than her fair share of chipping in. There is a shortage of dedicated people in the world like her, and I feel a heartbreaking emptiness whenever it dawns on me that she is no longer here with us.
Ms. M was such a wonderful, loving, caring person. One of those people you look back thirty years after the fact and realize that was someone who was born to be a mother, because she was just so damn good at it. Make no mistake about that. She made a big impression on my life growing up, and its pretty devastating to hear that she has passed away. Without a doubt, she is going to be missed a lot, by a lot of people.
Tonight I'm going to wrap up a major scene and probably go back and reread some of the beginning of the book and do a few tweaks. I'm feeling a bit tired and weary, and my eyes are tired, but I should've had this book out the door yesterday. It's just the way things have been for me lately. It's certainly not for the sake of procrastination. The plan is to get this sucker out of here within the next couple of days. It's do-able, I just got to get the lead out and get r done. Wish me luck.