Wednesday, October 08, 2008

Finally Some Peace and Quiet

Bear Creek at Townsend Park

So I'm no where done with my freebie yet, and I'm ready to pull some serious Wile E. Coyote moves on my family. I swear sometimes when I tell them I'm stressed out and have a deadline, they just break out all the drive-you-nuts, no-holds-barred, let's be-total-jerks antics that they can come up with.

The early mornign hours went smooth as glass. I cleaned up much of one chapter and then made lunch. I have no idea what got into Mini, but he goes on this sudden in-house toddler rampage. He destroyed the seat of his baby rocking chair in the den, what he usually sits in to watch TV. It had to be taken out to the shed. That was just the tip of the iceberg. And really, the behavior surprised me. He usually saves the toddler rampage for when he's very sleepy, at which point I make him take a nap. Well, he carries on so, I figure that's got to be it. He's tired. And thus the wrestling match begins....

I finally get him down for a nap, and mom and hubby call me at the same time. I have to take hubby's call first since there is only two times during the day when he can call. After speaking to him, then I have to play phone tag with mom. This is all good. I'm just glad I got Mini beast down for that nap.

Around this time, I get an email from AOL telling me how to salvage my blog posts from my original online journal that I started the year I got pregnant with Mini. I used it as sort of a milestone journal for my pregnancy and for Mini's first year. There are also things in there like pets passing away, and my grandmom's battle with breast cancer. Things I don't want to lose or forget. I've been sweating a bit over how I was going to save all those old posts, and AOL gave us a really small window to save everything. I think there are something like 500 posts I wanted to keep. Anyway, I got the email saying how to tranfer them over to blogger. Some of them I archived on this blog, and I hope to move the others here to the Cora Zane blog eventually. That way they will be all in one spot.

I had an awful time trying to get the tranfer to work. Namely because that blog was set to private. Of course AOL only gives half-arsed instructions on how to switch it over too. And there is no tech support for blogger. Yikes!

Well, while I am fighting to do the transfer, Oldest comes in from school and starts in with me about how hubby and I are holding him back - not letting him get a job, etc. etc. Inside I'm ready to bawl because I recognize that "spoiling for an arguement" tone.

Ok. We've been over this very thing with Oldest a million times. Up until this summer, Oldest has been too scared to drive a car and has claimed he doesn't want one. That changed in late August, however, when his friend who drives a convertible got Oldest into the excitement of helping him browse car lots to find a new truck. Suddenly Oldest is bitten by the bug.

I tried to sign him up for driver's ed before school let out last year, but he didn't want to go. I told him he'd have to if we're to pay for his car insurance because they really sock it to you here in Louisiana. Well, of course, he ended up not going, but NOW he wants a car and to drive - because he sees all his friends are driving, and I do understand. Fine. But the economy isn't as good as it was last year - and it wasn't sparkling then, if you know what I mean. Without the drivers ed, we don't get that insurance rate cut, and even if we did have a car to give him right now - we wouldn't be able to afford the insurance on it.

All Oldest hears is "no". And since he can't have a car right away, this is a great injustice to him - it means we are holding him back. He wants money, and he can't go out and get a part-time job because he doesn't have a car. This is another thing all his friends have, but he doesn't - the part time job.

So round two of the battle begins. Our stance on the part time job has been this - save it for summer. For the past two years, we have had to really push for him to perform at school, and we have actually worried about him graduating thanks to a poor gpa. I know he can do it too - he was in gifted and talented early on. It blows my mind how he can do these insane math problems in his head, no paper needed. He's got the smarts, but he just won't apply them where he needs to. That being the case, my main thing is to just GET THE KID GRADUATED, so that if he wants to either right after school or later, he can actually get into college.

The only reason why he has even half way applied himself this year is because we've told him if he wants that big graduation gift :: I will be taking him on a week-long trip to Japan after graduation :: he has got to keep his grades up. No ifs ands or buts. NO exceptions. Make the grades, or you don't go. No negotiations.

He wants the trip really bad, and I want to be able to take him. On the other hand, I know my son, and he is a single minded person. You cannot give him two tasks at once. He can't handle it. It's an ADHD thing. If he got a job right now, he'd obsess over the money, and school would suffer. Hence, the Save It For Summer! mantra.

Of course, that would mean he'd have to get his drivers license this coming summer. But still he doesn't want to take drivers ed. He has it in his mind he is going to have his friends drive him back and forth to work, or otherwise he's going to ride a bicycle 10 miles one way to make it to town - to work. It makes me tired just thinking about it. His head just isn't in the right place, and you tell him to focus on the end game, focus on school for now, and suddenly we are holding him back and the sulking ranting teen emerges. The very sulky ranting teen that I think I'd like to give the gift of a hard knock on the head with a really big stick.

So anyway, he stirs the argument and won't let it die. He goes to his room to pout, then comes back. Mini is up at this point, and when his big Bubba parks himself in the living room, he thinks it's playtime. Bubba is there for no other reason but to pout in my presence, so any time Mini approaches it's : leave me alone. I tell them both to get straight and be nice before I put them both in separate corners. And yet this pouting thing goes on for about two hours non-relenting.

It takes only one smarty remark to set me off. I can't even remember what it was now. But that really, OH, is that right, mother? tone of voice. Well, that really tweaked my Irish. I left my desk chair, walked to the edge of the couch where he was sitting and smacked him promptly on the calf of the leg. He sits up in total surprise, and I am sad to say I let the temper loose. Then again, I guess that was what it took to get the point across. I can't shit him $10,000 for a car, and I'm not going to let him get wrapped up in a job if he has to depend on friends to take him back and forth. They're friends, not his husbands, so get over it. His timing sucks for one thing, and so now that he's passed by the initial car-getting opportunity, he's going to have to wait until the finances get a bit better. We're not hurting, exactly, but we are having to seriously watch our spending. Fact of life.

This all went down right as hubster was coming in the door from work. Hubby grimaces coming in. And Oldest skulks to his room to pout it out. *calgon* Hubby knows better than to cross my path at this stage, so he takes Mini and goes to chat on the phone for a while. I think finally: peace! I sit down and work on my stuff for about twenty minutes before the guys all come back in. Oldest is in a much better humor now. Mini is spry. Hubby is bubbly. And now they are all under foot. Hm....

I put Mini in the bath, and hubby sits down to gossip with friends on myspace. After the bath, I explain to hubby I really need my writing time tonight, so I am going to take Mini on to bed. It's around 9:00 by this point, and he's okay with it. He says he's just going to sit up and browse the net a while. Cool beans.

It takes Mini over an hour to fall asleep. I come back into the den and it's a wreck - building blocks in the floor. The kitchen is also a wreck. Oldest is still awake - It's after ten-thirty on a school night. Hit the sack, kid! Hubby is at the table listening to prank phone calls online, and watching funny videos. They are all really loud. I suffer it, and go to get my laptop. I've already explained I need to get some things done. Now I have to clean up after everyone too. When hubby starts beckoning me to watch funny video clips, I tell him no thanks. It's twenty minutes to 11, and I still don't have my first damn chapter finished.

He doesn't understand this, and he says, "Fine. I'll just shut it all down, then." And he does. And promptly goes to bed without a "goodnight" or a kiss.

*sigh* Do you hear that? No? I thought not.

It's the sound of blissful PEACE AND QUIET after a day of family horror. It's a small wonder I have any hair left. Everything chore-wise will have to wait until tomorrow because I have a deadline. My challenge for this week is to see if I can keep my sanity in tact until the end of the week. *fingers crossed*

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