Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Lots of Lemons
Around 10 o'clock last night, I walked past the chest freezer in the dining room and noticed a red streak coming out of the drain on the front. The first thought that crossed my mind: Damn it, Mini! The freezer controls are on the front, and there's a big old blinky green light that attracts toddlers like moths to a candleflame.
I checked, and sure enough, someone (gee, I can't imagine who) turned the thermostat to OFF. So, any guess what that red streak is? Try blood from thawed meat running out onto the floor.
Since I didn't know when this might've happened, I moved my laptop off the freezer and cracked it open. Rrraarrrgg!! It smelled like a hacked up corpse in there. Gotta love the funk of spoiled chicken, turkey, and ground beef all rolled into one. Hubby nearly hurled, and Oldest came lumbering out of his room "What's that smell?" Uh, try BLOATED chicken carcass. Again, I reitterate: Damn it, Mini!
Hubby and I closed the lid and shoved the freezer into the laundry room so I could clean up the mess underneath. The drain had poured about a half pint of blood under the freezer where it had dried to the tile. I broke out the mop, lysol, pine oil, and everything else I could think of and started scrubbing. It wasn't hard to clean up, but the smell! I'm not faint of heart, but geez... Since hubby couldn't stomach the stench, I knew right then I'd have to clean the chest freezer out all by myself.
I left the freezer alone until this morning because I didn't have anything to tackle the situation with. So first thing when Mini woke me up, I got ready for a shopping trip. Around 7 o'clock, I had my two cups of coffee, Mini and myself dressed to go. I peeked around the door at Oldest and told him to get up. He grumbled, "Where are we going?" Why, we are going to buy a small computer desk to put my laptop on now that the freezer is in the other room. Oh, and we're going to by a plug adapter for the freezer, disinfecting wipes, sponges, and tons and tons of baking soda.
Oldest and I picked up everything we needed - not without the manadatory three phone calls in the middle of Walmart, however. I don't know why, but everytime I get in a store with Mini yowling in the cart, everyone in the countryside decides to call me. Mom called from my house to find out where we were. Hubby called me twice. I somehow managed to get out of the store by 9. *_*
We got home and first things first - I garbage bagged all the rancid meat. Two whole chickens were in the freezer, and the packages around them had bloated into stinking gas bombs. No kidding. When I picked them up, the pressure on the corners caused the seams to pop a bit, and air came hissing out of the chicken bags like air let out of a freaking balloon. Only the air was like toxic chicken fart, or something. *GAG* We loaded all the stinky meat into the back of the Jeep, and hauled it to the dump. Oldest wheezed and hurped all the way dump. I had the container of disinfecting wipes with us, and he kept opening the container for a wiff of "Fresh scent" as labeled on the side. Lucky for Mini he was silent all the way to the dump, or I might've returned sans 1 busy-fingered child.
When we got back, the fun really began - scrubbing out the freezer. This was left up to me, and I went hands-in. I soaked up all the rancid blood in a towel, tossed it in the wash, then scrubbed the inside and outside with a cocktail of soapy water, de-funk-i-fying cleansers, all topped with baking soda. By the time I came back in the main part of the house, all I could smell was a lingering odor similar to the smell of dead fish. I do believe my sinuses are FRIED.
Oh, but then there was the desk to deal with. The only thing the store had as far as desks went was one of those do-it-yourself kits. I'm pretty good at them when need be, but dang... Mini kept running off with parts until I was screaming for Oldest to come entertain him.
I finally had my house back to normal by eleven-thirty. Lovely way to spend a morning, no? *rabid snarling*
Hubby came home for lunch and brought McD's for everyone. What a man! The last thing I wanted to do was cook for lunch. He stayed long enough to eat, and then he was off to work again. I took Mini for a much needed nap. While he was sleeping, my mom came for a visit, and the day started to look up. We sat around chit chatting, waiting to see if Mini would wake up so she'd have a chance to visit with him. He didn't, but I did get a call from Hubby. He called to tell me that the one house I reaaaaally, really liked (that is actually nearby) had just been taken off the market. Damn. Which pretty much sums up my day.
What can you do, you know? I hung up the phone after talking to hubby and looked at my mom. "Oh, hon, which one?" She asked, then it dawned on her. "Oh, no! The one with the circular kitchen!"
"Are you okay?"
Quick, somebody say something funny before my effing Relacore wears off...